Dividing My Time

Day of the Defenders of the Fatherland/День защитника Отечества: A Hymn To Him

As you spend February 23rd (Men's Day), so shall you spend 8th of March (Women's Day).

~HRH (and a lot of other Russian men I know.)

A friend, who is perhaps not the brightest bulb on the tanning bed, has just figured out the double entendre humor I use in referring to my “Handsome Russian Husband” as “HRH.”

“You know,” she said, “That can also stand for ‘His Royal Highness’. Like Prince William.”

Really?

The moniker HRH is eminently applicable to Russian men, who are all brought up by their mothers believing that they are, indeed, royal scions and therefore above such plebian and unmanly concerns like housework.  In Russia, they are still teaching Home Ec to the girls and Shop to the boys, with no reform in sight – and certainly not regarding the impending gender-specific public holidays.  In place of one messy, gender-neutral love fest on February 14th, Russians are suiting up for the very separate Men’s Day (February 23rd) and its companion piece, International Women’s Day (March 8th.)  

I’m a Russian historian, so I like to delve into the origin of national holidays. Men’s Day is very interesting.  Its full, and characteristically overblown, name is “The Day of the Defenders of the Motherland,” and it celebrates the 1918 rout of Kaiser Wilhelm’s forces by the just-that-day-drafted Red Army.  The name eventually morphed from “Red Army Day,” to “Day of the Soviet Army and Navy,” and in 1995, as part of a re-branding campaign to drop “Red” from everything, ended up as “Day of the Defenders of the Motherland.”  In HRH’s family, we take the 23rd of February very seriously indeed, since we are a military family:  HRH and Dedushka both served as officers in the Red Army – as did Great Uncle Boris, and several others, dating right back to that Red Letter Day in 1918.  Interestingly, this list also includes several gutsy great aunts and great-great grandmothers, who served, with distinction, in the Red Army as border patrol guards, field medical officers, and behind-the-lines guerilla fighters in Occupied Ukraine.  Nevertheless, February 23rd remains devoted exclusively to the men of Russia, who, ipso facto, are all obliged to defend the Motherland as part of their mandatory military service.  

On its current web site, the Russian Consulate in Houston, TX offers helpful guidance on the celebration of Men’s Day: “On this day,” it says, “the entire masculine population - from boys to old men - receive special greetings and presents. Women have a wonderful opportunity to convey their warmest and kindest feelings to the loved ones and to indulge them with sings (sic) of attention and affection.”  

Translation: Women: shop, cook, clean.   Lather, rinse, repeat.

HRH, in mufti, is not a force to be reckoned with on the domestic front, although he does open wine bottles, which, along with driving a car, is what well-brought up Russian men consider “man’s work.”  I once begged him to empty the dishwasher.  He sighed deeply, went to the sink, and stood, his back to me.

“Darling,” I said quietly.

“What – “ he barked, turning around to glare at me.

“Just that, the dishwasher, you know, is the appliance on your left.”

  HRH and Dedushka won’t be emptying anything except a bottle of premium whiskey this week – as we women convey our warmest and kindest feelings.  I’ve bought HRH a new super sonic corkscrew, Babushka has the sweet Sovietskoye Champanskoye warming up in the vegetable steamer, and Velvet is on dishwasher duty, so we are all set to indulge our Defenders with the royal attention and affection they deserve.

But I refuse to sing.

--------------------------------------------

This post is part of The Stunt.

This post first appeared as an article in Russia Beyond The Headlines on February 10, 2010.

--------------------------------------------

Hey there readers!

This may well have been the post that started me down the rocky road of profprazniks.   Did you have a nice men's day?   I decided to put all my chips on one number and spent a large part of Tuesday night making bliniy and all kinds of good stuff.  Then everyone got sick.  So now the house is full of food.  Any Defenders out there still looking for a good meal?

Day of Russia’s First Naval Victory at Hanko Peninsula (1714)/День первой в российской истории морской победы русского флота у мыса Гангут (1714): Russia’s Spanish Armada

We stand to our guns, to our guns all day.

~Gilbert & Sullivan (H.M.S. Pinafore)

Today is another of Russia’s fifteen Days of Military Glory or День воинской славы России. These are key military victories from 1242 – 1945 which, according to the 1995 legislation of the Federal Duma of Russia “played a pivotal role in the history of Russia’s history, and in which Russia’s forces earned themselves the honor and respect of their contemporaries, and the grateful memory of those who came after them.” We have visited a few, such as Victory Day and the Battle of Poltava, and we’ll get to more as we slog through the Year of Living Russian Holidays.

The Battle of Hanko Peninsula is known in Russia as “Gangut” since there isn’t an “H” in Russian.  It is helpful to know this, so as to not appear as if you’ve lived your life in a remote Sierra Leonese village if a Russian mentions someone uber famous such as Adolf Gitler, the head of the Nazi party, or Gamlet, the Prince of Denmark, who features in Shakespeare’s tragedy of the same name, or, if you are under twenty-five, Gryffendor’s Quidditch Seeker, Garri Potter, and his good buddy Germione (pronounced Ger-mee-own-eh) Grandzher.   You don’t want to be caught in that trap.

The Battle of Hanko Peninsula is Russia’s first major naval battle, fought during the Great Northern War in 1714 against the Swedes, with Peter The Great pitting his new navy against the much larger, and more experienced Swedish fleet of Emporer Charles XII, in an effort to secure sea access to the Russian forces in Finland.  Admiral Apraksin made an initial attempt to open the lines, but was pushed to the other side of the peninsula by the strong Swedish fleet.  Apraksin then sent an urgent message to Peter to come and command the troops himself, and it should come as no surprise that Peter did not have to be asked twice.

You have to hand it to the Russians, sometimes.  Full marks for not giving up, where others might.  In attempting to break through the Swedish lines, the Russians decided to drag their galleys across the peninsula on land, which can’t have been a walk in the park.   When the Swedes found out, they deployed a detachment of eleven ships, including the aptly named flagship “Elefant.”   The Russian ships were much smaller, and proved easier to handle in the calm weather which prevailed all day on August 8th and were all able to break through the Swedish lines by the early hours of August 9th, according to Apraksin’s orders.  Once through the lines, the substantially larger Russian force was easily able to surround the cumbersome Swedish fleet and ultimately capture them.  

Gangut was the first naval victory for Russia’s nascent naval forces, and the gains in Finland remained in Russian hands until the end of the war in 1721.  In commemoration of this victory, the Russian Navy maintains, at all times, one active battleship or vessel, which is called “The Gangut.”

Congratulations to all Russia’s sailors and naval officers!

--------------------------------------

This post is part of The Stunt.

-------------------------------------

Ahoy there readers!

Do you know which are the other twelve Days of Military Glory?   Can you guess?  Here is a subtle hint for one of them:  it’s a battle “on the rocks.”  Stay tuned for that and other important professional holidays coming right up!

Hungry for more tales of Russia’s navy or Peter The Great?  We have plenty!  Like these:

Day of the Black Sea Fleet /День Черноморского флота: The Boys Who Brought You The Battleship Potemkin!

Day of the Northern Fleet of Russia/День Северного флота России: Guess Who’s Coming to Dinner?

Day of Victory over the Swedes at Poltava / День воинской славы России — Полтавская битва (1709): The Peter (The Great) Principle

Day of Victory over the Swedes at Poltava / День воинской славы России — Полтавская битва (1709): The Peter (The Great) Principle

'Twas after dread Pultowa's day, 


When fortune left the royal Swede - 


Around a slaughtered army lay, 


No more to combat and to bleed. 

The power and glory of the war, 


Faithless as their vain votaries, men, 


Had passed to the triumphant Czar,

~ George Gordon (Lord Byron) "Mazeppa"

 “If I say, Battle of Poltava to you, what immediately springs to mind?” I asked HRH.  It’s been very hot lately, and I don’t do well in that kind of weather.  I need some inspiration.

“Peter The Great?” he asked, taking another hefty swig of cold beer.

“And?”

“The Swedes?” he ventured.

“Anything else?” I asked.

He scratched his head and thought a bit.

“We won?”

Russian History is neither HRH’s core interest, nor part of his skill set.  He confuses the Nicholases, the Alexanders and the Catherines (though at least he does not make the common mistake that Catherine The Great was married to Peter The Great).  But he got full marks on The Battle of Poltava, and bonus points for a succinct distillation of the salient points about today’s holiday: Peter’s victory over the Swedes at the Battle of Poltava on July 8, 1709, and their ultimate surrender on July 10th.

When last we encountered Peter The Great, he was also engaged in a contretemps with the Swedes, the naval victory in 1703 which secured him the strategic mouth of the Neva River on which he built his dream city, Saint Petersburg.   If that was his first modest victory against his primary adversary, Charles XII of Sweden, Poltava was the zenith of Peter’s emergence as a military might, as he triumphantly hurled the might of his newly re-organized Western style army of 45,000 troops at Charles XII and the Ukrainian Cossack Hetman, Mazeppa.  Ukraine gave up its dreams of independence (what else is new?) and Charles XII and Sweden had to cede their preeminence as the most significant player in the region:  they limped away and spent three centuries crafting a new strategy to invade Russia, which would ultimately prove successful.

Today is one of fifteen “Days of Military Glory,” victories, which were recognized by the State Duma in 1995 in legislation entitled “About the Days of Military Glory of Russia” (so, now you know what the Duma does all day) as “playing a significant role in the history of Russia, and in which Russian troops have earned the honor and respect of contemporaries and grateful memory of posterity.”

I was interested to read, recently (in Bruce Lincoln’s The Romanovs) that Peter was not weaned until he was two years old, which, for me, explains volumes: not only his vigorous health, but also his addiction to instant gratification. “Boats,” you can see him thinking when, as a teenager, he and his Dutch tutor found the rotting remains of a keeled sea vessel in 1688, “Boats…hmmmm…I think I’d like a navy.”  Never mind that Russia was completely landlocked. This could also explain his impatience with anything that stood in his way: a meddlesome older half sister as Regent during his minority?  Overthrow her and stick her in a Convent.  Boring conservative first wife?  Rinse and repeat.   Long traditional kaftans getting in the way?  Adopt Western clothes. Money tight?  Tax people for keeping their beards.   Moscow seeming a little backward? Abandon and create a new capital on a mosquito-infested swamp.  Church getting a little too powerful?  Cut it down to size and make it into a government department, and, for good measure, mock it, holding a mock Synod entitled “The Vastly Extravagant, Supremely Absurd, Omni-Intoxicated Synod,”  (and you have to wish they’d revive that particular Petrine tradition.)

Dictatorial?  Da.  Effective?  Definitely Da.   This is the kind of ruler the Russian people understand, expect, and ultimately admire.  Larger-than-life, clear on what he wants, and slightly crazy. Certainly no one, except perhaps Stalin, has so thoroughly dragged Russia kicking and screaming into the direction of his choice by sheer force of his own personal will power

Peter The Great is the impossible standard against which all other Russian rulers must measure themselves, and I can’t think that, in their heart of hearts, they feel they are in danger of outstripping him in any way.

Peter, for example, would never have tweeted.   Never.

------------------------------------

This post is part of The Stunt

------------------------------------

Greetings Readers!

Had you heard about The Battle of Poltava?  Did you know that Sweden was such a military power in the 17th Century? What’s your take on Peter?  Do you buy into the breast-feeding idea?  Let me know, by leaving a comment below.   If you enjoyed this post, linger a while and read some more just like it:

The Day of Victory /День Победы: "In defeat, unbeatable: in victory, unbearable"

Russia Day /День России: No, It’s Not Independence Day

Day of the Furniture Makers/День мебельщика: Let’s Hear it For The Swedes!